Monday, 11 April 2011

Time for my hypochondri-act

Met with my chemotherapy nurse today, to go over the process of treatment and what I should expect during and after each session. What a downer. I'd had a lovely weekend with family and friends enjoying the sunshine and this was a dampener... (Oh, and look! It's raining now. All I need is some melodramatic music and the theme is set.)

Part of me is obviously going through a selective process - basic instinct, I suppose. It's almost as if I'd forgotten over the weekend what's in store for me when we come back from our holiday, but sadly the chemo nurse was very happy to remind me. She gave me a list of the side-effects, which if she knew me better she wouldn't have done, as I'm your classic hypochondriac. I make a very conscious effort of never reading contra-indications of any medicine given to me as I will be feeling the symptoms soon after. But one thing I cannot be psychosomatic about is hair loss. Although I will be wearing the cold cap, there is still a very big possibility that I will lose my hair. And I haven't decided yet what I will do when that happens: do I go for the denial wig, the hippie scarf, or the 'looks like a robber' knitted cap? I'd like to think that I can get away with the scarf and look stylish and interesting with it, but I know that I'll just look like a very eccentric person - not helped by my bursting into tears at the most inappropriate moments.

My very good friend C used to perpetually annoy me by asking me to guess who I would look like if I were bald, and then refuse to tell me the answer. I suppose I will soon find out...


  1. Hair or no hair you'll still be the most beautiful woman in the world to me!!

  2. Chinot, I agree with your sweet hubby...there's something abt. your well-chiseled face that is so uniquely beautiful...your dynamite personality will always be part of who you the end, these challenging road will build your character; and you will not only be beautiful inside and out, but stongER and wisER as well! Praying for you and your family...and travelling on this road with you ;D- Poala Galvez Millan
    ps. many of my friends and family are breast CA survivors.

  3. Count me in as part of your journey Chinot. I am praying and rooting for my beautiful talented wonderful friend.- Sam Celiz

  4. Hey sweetie! As promised, I read your entries in your blog and the dramatic mood swings they indicate. But the bottom line is still, YOU ARE BLESSED --- for a number of reasons that you already know.

    I'll have to nag you, though, about lemon grass. Please, please, please try it. I've talked to several people who swear by its benefits. Do you have it in London?

    As for Fuda hospital, again I've heard many encouraging things about it but since you're set on chemo, so be it and I'm sure all our prayers, offerings, sacrifices will pull you through with minimal side effects.

    By the way, Malou my secretary entered your name in daily masses and prayers at the Adoration Chapel of the Pink Sisters in Tagaytay.

    Continue to be strong sweetie. We love you!

  5. I agree with Al. :) You are a natural beauty no matter what.

    By the way, it is easy to grow lemon grass, Chinot! If you can find a Chinese grocery or market, you just plant the stem and it wil surely grow. In fact we have it in the garden here in the compound. :)

  6. Your news has thrown me. Despite all you are going through you are still a very positive, couragous and warm loving person - as to hair it is not going to change "you".
    My thoughts are with you and I am just at the end of a phone so use me from time to time.
    Love Suzanne